Improvising Mummy!

This morning we managed to leave the house on time and arrived at Felicity’s nursery with time to park on the better car park which allows me to get away quickly without spectators watching my awkward maneuvering of the boy into the car because someone has parked too close. Or maybe more likely I have not parked within the lines.

We are walking down towards the school and stood right at the top of the steps, centre stage if you like. Everyone is passing by and courteously nodding away to each other as they stay in the perfectly forming lines filtering into the individual classrooms, all seemingly making far more effort than me with the school drop off attire. I make a mental note to get up earlier and up my game on this matter like I have promised myself since term began. Then mid chat with the princess, she sneezes... I can tell without looking that there was some sheer velocity behind the sneeze and fractions of a second later I hear, “Mummmmyyyyy, nose wipe!!!!”. I fumble around my pockets but not a tissue in sight... do I have time to rush back to the car?? No, it would be a logistical nightmare with Edward in tow and I can’t very well leave her snot strewn nose until the classroom. So, with Neo like agility and speed, I swoop in front of her to shield her from onlookers and grab Edward's sock from my pocket. The sock is clean! I try to quickly clean her nose without her realizing. My little darling is far too observant for that... “Mummy, you’re wiping my nose with Edward's socks!!!” She yells out! What can I say, she’s not lying... so I shhhh her and try to laugh it off, “Silly Billy, haha!”.

We get to her class and drop off is not too painful and I’m feeling pretty happy with my Super Mum parenting powers!

Then amazingly one of the other Mummy’s decides to speak to me... this doesn’t happen very often and I am almost childlike and giddy... will I finally be part of the crew???? I conscientiously monitor my tone of voice and control my excitement, I’ve got to play this cool for Felicity’s sake! I don’t want to screw up our chances. We’re now on number exchange and I calmly take my mobile from my pocket and there it is... the moment it all falls drastically apart... smeared across the screen of my phone is Felicity’s snot.

I look at the mother and she turns away out of politeness and clearly pretends not to have noticed. I’m stuck between whether to tell the story, which is pretty disgusting anyway or whether to quickly put my phone back and tell her to take my number instead to save us both the embarrassment. Phone away and I give her my number which she quickly types in her phone. Lovely lady has now suddenly realized she is in a rush and we part ways. Needless to say, I’ve not heard from her yet.